Oink Oink

I have been away for the last couple weeks but this post isn't about what a joyous time that was (that's the next post) this is about the damn swine flu. We on the island are at Level 5. level 6 being "we are more than likely in big trouble" pandemic level.

Now if you read the news there are a plethora of conflicting reports. According to news sources Puerto Rico has had anywhere from 1-8 deaths and 100-800 confirmed cases.

Let me tell you how it's playing out here on the "isla del encanto": We have had 8 deaths, 300 confirmed cases and about another 600 unconfirmed. A whole lot of people are walking around in full pandemic regalia. (surgical masks, gloves, and vats of alcohol based hand sanitizer.)

Our government (which is run by a bunch of stupid, greedy people who make all decisions based on their own personal agendas and not at all in the best interest of the country) have been on TV daily, warning us about our up coming doom yet telling us not to worry, it's all under control. The media of course has also done it's best to fuel the pandemic panic fires.

We really have no idea about the real facts since our government is stupid, but I think I already told you they were stupid, right? As of today meetings are being held behind closed doors to decide if in fact a level 6 will be declared today. In the mean time, we have been told to cancel all activities that involve large groups and several municipalities have shut down operations for the next week. There is a possibility that all government offices will close but I don't really know if that's true because well, our government is stupid.

The governor while making his daily news briefs has warned the public not to hug, or kiss or shake hands with anyone, not anyone, for any reason. Hellooooo this is Puerto Rico, does he have any idea that as a culture, as Puerto Ricans, physical touch is a must, it's an instinct, it's what makes us Puerto Rican. So as you can guess "the people" have gotten very creative to meet this new challenge. I saw people today touch elbows (because you know elbows can't spread germs), some throw kisses at each other, others touch finger tips and then pull out the vats of disinfectant to smear all over each other. Which if you ask me could be fun if done naked with the right person.

As for me, I am not doing anything except my same old routine, while constantly disinfecting my hands when ever I touch something that perhaps some human or some swine may have touch prior to me. I open a door somewhere public, I clean my hands, close a public door, clean my hands, touch money, clean hands, you get the picture? My hands are dry and chapped because using an alcohol based disinfectant on them and washing them 300 times daily has managed to destroy the natural softness and beauty that were once my hands. It is however a small price to pay to show my patriotic loyalty, or to prevent the spread of swine flu depending on which news report you follow.

If all hell doesn't break out today, I'll be back soon to tell you all about my vacation. Right now ,I am off to wash my hands because I don't know what swine might have touched this keyboard while I was away. (you can click on the Pooh pic to enlarge if you can't read it)

Update: we now have 9 confirmed deaths, 22 unconfirmed and so far still a level 5, school should start Aug 5 but media claims that will be delayed, more baloney, little facts. that is all ...

We Three Kings

As most of you are now winding down from all the holiday festivities, I am still stuck in holiday hell. In Puerto Rico the party continues until 3 kings day. (January 6) Supposedly our best gifts are yet to come. Ya see santa only brings the small stuff to the island but the 3 Kings they bring the good stuff. The gifts and wishes we really long for. (maybe that's when my goat arrives)

El dia the los Reyes as it is known here in Puerto Rico is also known as the feast of the Epiphany. Epiphany derived from the Greek word epiphania meaning revelation is based on the biblical story that tells of the Magi or 3 kings (Caspar, Melchoir and Balthasar) who saw a bright light on the night Christ was born and followed it to Bethlehem. There they found the Christ child and presented him with gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh. 3 kings day is also known as little Christmas, and the Twelfth night. 3 Kings day is the official end of the holiday season's "twelve days" of Christmas, counting from Christmas December 25th to the Epiphany on January 6th.

Because you know I love keeping you informed here's a little info on the 3 Kings:

El Rey Melchoir was the Sultan of Arabia. He was the oldest of the Magi and was considered a small and gentle man. Melchor had a long white beard and wore elegant crimson robes. His gift was gold which was much used by the Hebrews for the Temple and was plentiful in the time of David and Solomon. Gold was not coined until after the reign of King David, was an article of commerce and was sold by weight. Saint Melchor's feast day is January 7th. Saint Melchor's figure always goes before the other Kings in a manger scene.

El Rey Baltazar was a Nubian King and ruler of Ethiopia. Baltazar was dressed in exquisite robes. As were all the Kings. His gift was myrrh, a precious and aromatic resin that comes from the bark of thorny African trees and symbolized suffering. Myrrh was a precious commodity in the Middle East. It was one of the ingredients of the holy ointment, (Exodus 30:23), and an embalming substance. (John19:39) It is also used in medicine and as a perfume. Legend tells us that Baltazar died soon after seeing the Christ child, in the presence of the other Wise Men. Saint Baltazar's feast day is January 8th.

El Rey Gaspar was Emperor of the Orient and ruled over all oriental lands. His clothes were gilded in gold. King Caspars gift was frankincense, an exceedingly aromatic gum used as sacred incense for temple services. It is distilled from a tree in Arabia. Frankincense was priceless, the "in" gift for kings and symbolized prayer. It was burned in temples to honor God. It is said the Gaspar traveled the furthest to visit the Christ child. Saint Gaspar's feast day is January 6th.

Traditionally kids all over the island will be searching for boxes, will be filling them with hay, camels (as happens with reindeer) do get hungry on long journeys, placing the box under their bed on January 5th. Then they will go to sleep because as with Santa, if you have to be asleep for the 3 Kings to show up. The next morning the hay is gone and in it's place presents! I'm on a quest to find a box perfect in size for a baby goat, I just have to figure out how to get the damn thing under my bed.

There will be plenty of merriment, roasted pork, arroz con gandules, a hell of a lot of moonshine and music so loud you can't hear yourself think. But at days end the holidays will be over, officially. Well almost over because on January 7th it's my birthday and no holiday season is complete without celebrating the day of my birth.

Cat on the loose

Puerto Rico has a panther on the loose. For the last week a panther has been helping himself to livestock on the island. It has been spotted in 3 areas. (Caimito, Rio Piedras, and Monte Hiedra) Our government is devising a plan to catch him. Of course our government also tried to catch the monkeys that were ruining crops and they failed miserably at that. I think they caught one but alas we still have a monkey problem.

I am thinking catching the panther might be a priority since perhaps he might be a more serious problem to humans than the monkeys. No one knows how a panther (not indigenous to the island) got here. The newspaper claims it got here illegally .... duh, ya think? I for one am sure he didn't get here on his own. Let's just hope there's more luck catching the panther than there was catching the monkeys.

I did Vote today

I just got back from voting. The whole process took about an hour. Here in my part of the world I don't think things have been any different from any where else on the planet. The politicians have made numerous promises, touted their expertise, slung a little mud, yelled and ranted to no end. There were many rallies and tons of fliers.

Puerto Rico has an incredible high percentage of people who vote. Statistics claim that from 95-98 percent of registered voters do vote. Politics is part of our culture. Everyone feels it is their right and their duty to vote. All island schools from kindergarten to high school hold mock elections to teach all students about the candidates and the voting process. The process is presented in ways that accommodate age. My 5 year old neighbor told me she voted for the candidate that offered her the new colorful playground. A 16 year old told me he voted based on what candidate offered more ideas for a better school system. All those votes are not counted but everyone learns about the system, their right to vote and their duty to the country. Obviously given the high percentage of voter turnout, indoctrinating children and young adults year after year to the importance of voting does have an effect. Everyone has the day off today. Everything is closed and alcohol cannot be served or bought until midnight. Selling booze on election day will get you a $5,000.00 fine. The only focus on the island today is voting.

I attended a rally for my town Mayor (who is running for re-election) on Sunday. It was a cultural community event. A celebration. There was food and music peppered with a healthy dose of politics. People of all ages discussing the pros and cons of issues. Heated discussions, laughter, and of course plenty of drinking, eating and dancing. To be Puerto Rican means you vote. Means you attend rallies, and talk politics every chance you get to make certain that everyone knows the issues and votes. We are as passionate about politics as we are about sex, family and culture. And that's pretty damn passionate.

I come from a family of political activists. People who are willing to die for their beliefs (some have) and for the protection of our rights here on the island. I come from a family that represents a vast array of political beliefs as well as political affiliations. I come from a family that believes you must stand up for what you believe and you must be counted, it is our right. I went and voted today to honor my family name and because it is my right. I am proud to be a part of the process that makes my country a free country.

I hope where ever you are, you too have the right to vote. I hope where ever you are, you exercise that right and not take it for granted.

And in case you are wondering as a resident of Puerto Rico I can not vote in presidential elections but if I could, I would have cast my vote for Barack Obama today.

I felt the earth move

On Saturday (oct. 11) I was sitting on the couch finishing my second cup of coffee before heading to my 7 AM hair appointment, when the couch started to tremble. Hmmm, I thought to myself, that's kind of odd. As the couch started to shake so did the table and the phone and other items through out the house. I felt the earth move under my feet, and as soon as I stopped singing the Carole King song, I realize we were having an earthquake. The earthquake happened on 6:40 AM and registered 6.1 (Richter scale) and it was felt through out the U.S. and British Virgin Islands as well. This was the worse earthquake to strike Puerto Rico in years.

Did you know we had earthquakes? (bet ya didn't) We have earthquakes because we are near the Puerto Rico trench. The trench being the deepest part of the Atlantic ocean. The trench region posses significant seismic and tsunami hazards to Puerto Rico and the U.S. Virgin Islands. I am not at all clear on why the trench has this "shaking ability" but it has something to do with being the most negative free-air gravity anomaly on Earth as well as having large landslide escarpments, trench axis and left lateral strike slip motion. Frankly, the why we have earth quakes in P.R. doesn't really matter, point is, I felt the earth move under feet.

Four strong earthquakes have affected Puerto Rico since it's colonization. The first one was in 1670 and the magnitude was not determined. On May 2, 1787 an earthquake registered 8.0 and cause significant structural damage through out the island. On November 18, 1867 a 7.5 magnitude earthquake hit followed by a tsunami that ran in land 490 feet, then on October 11, 1918 it was a 7.5 quake accompanied by a tsunami that was 19.5 feet high.

There have been numerous tremors through out the years but with this weekend's quake, the island was all abuzz about what could happen or might have happened or will happen should a "big one hit". A lot of people were afraid. As for me, well lets face it, this year has sucked mightily so far and I just don't care to think about the "big one". (unless of course it has to do with male genitalia) So I am just walking around doing what I got to do, singing or humming "I feel the earth move under my feet, I feel the sky tumbling down, I feel my heart start to trembling, whenever your around ". Damn I can't get that song out of my head ...

Rain and more Rain

According to the National Weather service:

A low pressure center over Puerto Rico is not yet a tropical depression but could become one soon . A flash flood watch has been posted for Puerto Rico and the U. S. Virgin Islands and flash flood warnings are in effect for parts of eastern Puerto Rico and the Virgin Islands. Dangerous flooding and mudslides will be an issue through Monday.

We have gotten 15 inches of rain since last night, reports claim we will average approximately 4 inches of rain per hour today. The temperature has dropped from 98 degrees to a chilly 72 degrees. You are probably thinking 72 isn't chilly but when your home is built of cinder block and cement and you live on a tropical island with extreme humidity and the temperature drops more than 25 degrees, trust me it's a chilly damp air that invades your core, OK my core but whatever.
That's the view from my balcony, behind all that gray are green lush mountains and palm trees. Yesterday after a little housework I spent the day in bed, looks like today I am doing the same.

"Into each life some rain must fall, some days must be dark and dreary"
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Trump This

I have never been a fan of Donald Trump. His personality always strikes me as cheesy, aberrant at best and his hair, let's not even go there. But the Donald has finally done something I can applaud. I am even debating doing my happy naked dance because this impacts the economy here on my little island in a big positive way.

Donald Trump and our governor Anibal Acevedo Vila announced a partnership to build a $600 million golf complex on the island northern coast. The new "Trump International Golf Club Puerto Rico" will be developed with a local construction company and will include 500 residences. The first 56 villas will be sold at prices starting at $1.4 million and will include access to a private jet, yacht and limousine service.

Developers will improve the golf course previously known as The Coco Beach Golf and Country Club in time to host the Puerto Rico Open, a PGA tour event.

What does this mean to Puerto Rico: JOBS, lot's of jobs, more tourism dollars, it impacts our shipping ports, air travel, and did I mention JOBS. More jobs. (a big deal since the pharmaceutical company's are leaving the island at a rapid pace).

So Mr. Trump, who cares that you always give me the hebbie jebbies. So what if you hair looks like it needs to find a better home. This Boricua is just thrilled to think our Puerto Rican economy is getting vitamin boost. Gracias for that.

Coqui, Coqui

We are a two car family here at the asylum. A 1998 white station wagon and a 2005 XL7. We use to be a one car family when in 2005 a snake decided it wanted to live in the station wagon. Although we did mange to get the snake out, no one wanted to ride in the station wagon for fear of retaliation from the snake and it's brethren. So we did what any crazy sane human would do, we bought a new car.

For sentimental reasons I would still take the station wagon for short scenic drives, but I always went alone because everyone feared that snakes were still in residence. I almost plunged off a cliff to my fiery death on a few occasions when I thought I felt something cold and wiggly lick my leg, (but that's a whole other story) still I felt the car should be taken out for a spin once in a while. That's just how I am, loyal.

One afternoon while washing/cleaning the station wagon we found several coqui's had made their home in side the car. We don't fear coqui's as much as snakes so we gingerly managed to catch them and set them free. (you can learn more about coqui's here) On a few other occasions another snake was found, a few more coqui and a spider, a big hairy tarantula, so now the car just sits, parked for all eternity. I draw the line at sharing a car with tarantulas. The station wagon has been given up to the reptiles and arachnids that have taken it hostage.

The car sat there for several months until recently. I decided it was just wrong to let the creepy crawlers win. I must take it back. I am woman, hear me roar, I ain't afraid of a few creepy crawlies. I washed the outside of the car and then mustered up the courage to tackle the inside, this is what I found : the coqui that once was.

Now I'm thinking we are a one car family. The station wagon will soon sport a "for sale" sign. Something about dead coqui's just gives me the creeps. Are there dead snakes in there? What about the spiders? What if some of these creatures are alive and well, feasting on the creatures weaker than them? Do you think I need to disclose any of this to the new buyer? Or should I just giggle as they drive away, knowing that at any moment they may feel something cold and wiggly licking their leg?

Los tres Reyes Magos

I am guessing that most of you are getting back to your "normal" post holiday routines, not so for things at the Asylum. Here on my little island the party continues and will continue until January 6th. (a little longer for those with more traditional catholic fervor than yours truly). January 6th is "el dia de los Reyes" (3 kings day). We will continue to celebrate (in the most outrageous of holiday spirits) until the 3 kings deliver fabulous presents ( Santa was just a teaser) and we eat, drink and party "'till the cows come home" or the roosters crow letting us know that it's almost sun up and time to sleep.

Trying to get anything done in this country is never an easy task, but from thanksgiving until after 3 kings day, it's just a complete waste of time. Don't even try to conduct some sort of business, it will only make you want to "go postal" (which is usually frowned upon, more so during the holiday season). Nothing gets done during the holidays, most of the island is busy cooking special foods, having parties and staying somewhat inebriated.

30 years ago a child growing up in Puerto Rico didn't know about or care about Santa Claus. January 6th was the most special day, the day when the 3 Kings would arrive to deliver gifts to the baby Jesus and on their way would stop to drop off a gift for each child. Children would find boxes and fill them with hay for the camels, place them by/under their beds on the 5th and wake up to gifts left by "los Reyes".

The tradition of "los Reyes" is taken very seriously here on my island. The catholic church declared the Magi saints and gave each his own feast day. On the days following 3 kings day the octavas and the octavitas are celebrated to honor the magi. "Los Reyes mago" from the Persian magu meaning magician, also the name applied to the 3 wise men in the bible who followed the star of Bethlehem. The bible story does not name them nor give their number but Christian tradition from about the 7th century names the 3 kings Melchior, Gaspar and Balthazar.

Since Christmas day, every day, every where I go I am surround by the Magi. I even saw them live and in person at the mall Sunday, they replaced Santa by the Christmas tree and of course in the holiday tradition for about $7 you can have your picture taken with them. Their beards fit just as poorly as Santa's did but their colorful robes were much more rockin' then Santa's red and white suit.

If I don't post too often between now and el dia de los 3 Reyes Mago, please know that it's not you, it's all about me ... me and my quest for the perfect box. The box I will lovingly fill with fresh hay, the box big enough to fit a few precious jewels, a couple pair of blahniks, a little white chocolate, a plane ticket and a $50 iTunes gift card. And anything else the magi think I am worthy of, after all, I have been a very good girl.

When it rains ...

Tropical storm Olga has been visiting the island, this is the river near my house. It is normally very clear water but due to the rain and our red clay like soil, it's not looking too pretty.

That's the bridge I need to cross to get into town, I had to take the "long" route to town today.




The waterfall that sprouted where once there was none.













At least I still have an internet connection.